My 6 Biggest Mistakes at #TBEX

5th December 2014 / 5 comments

Humor Post- 

The TBEX travel conference is one of the best ways for travel bloggers to get connected with industry professionals and grow their network. It also can be a ridiculous amount of fun if done right. I’ve accepted that my place on earth is to be a shining example of what NOT to do.

1) Don’t Ask Johnny Jet to put you in a Choke Hold

Cause he will do it. And Johnny’s got a mean choke hold. His grip tightened with every botched selfie and pretty soon I couldn’t feel my extremities. I couldn’t swallow my free drinks for at least 10 minutes. The next morning I woke up with a pounding headache and looking like I lost a Mexican bar fight. It made me feel a little better that my tweet went viral and I won a free iPad, which leads me to point number two…

 

2) Don’t Use the Bathroom During the Winner Announcements

It’s just not a smart move. Just hold it you idiot. While I was in the bathroom splashing water on my face to get rid of the cobwebs from the head lock, they were out on stage announcing, “Brad Bernard, come up and get your iPad… Brad Bernard… I guess he didn’t show up tonight… OK, next…” So now, not only did I get beaten up intentionally and forfeit my iPad, but now everyone thinks I sneak off to the swinger bar when nobody’s looking. Bad move.

3) Don’t Sneak up on #GaryExpress

Gary Arndt is arguably the f*cking coolest person God has ever created. His “Revealing All,” presentation was non-stop value bombs. If you stop to tweet a quotable line, you’ll miss four more. If you sneak up on him, he may just reveal more than you expect. We snuck into his presentation early to catch a glimpse of the man himself, only to find him practicing karaoke, to Baby Got Back, “I like big butts and I cannot lie…” He said he was testing the microphone but I’m sure he was hoping his talents would get discovered. He wasn’t a bad singer, but that may be the reason for his sabbatical, where rumor has it he lives in a cave and only comes out to complain about the slow wifi.

4) Don’t Take Too Much Dramamine Before a Boat Trip

Dramamine is wonderful for avoiding sea sickness, but when we all took too much before a boat trip, we all turned into Zombies. I awoke out of my coma with just enough time to capture Max Hartshorne‘s expert sleeping technique before passing out again. We were all back to normal after a few hours but I am definitely missing some memories of that day.

 

5) Don’t Take Nick Anywhere

Nick Huggins is known for living vicariously through himself (he has yet to teach us), but ever since we met him, his debauchery seems to follow us. First, Anne tells us he spilled everywhere at BlogHouse and then we wake up at our Flipkey penthouse mansion to find that someone had thrown all of the chairs in the pool. Anne tells us it was Nick again and I didn’t even think Nick was in Cancun. He must be a ninja. Come to think of it, I don’t remember him spilling at BlogHouse either.

 

6) Don’t Try to Outdrink The #ChampagneDon

Don George likes his Champagne, but don’t try to keep up. It just won’t work. I believe Don is genetically immune to the negative effects of the bubbly, but you are not. You might end up in the bathroom splashing water on your face and wondering why you thought it was a good idea to ask Johnny Jet to put you in a choke hold.

I’m sure the tequila has killed a few brain cells, so please let me know if I’ve forgotten a few. What is the funniest moment at your first TBEX?

A big thank you to Flipkey which helped us find an amazing penthouse condo for our stay at TBEX Cancun. We found it a much better (and more affordable) option than the all-inclusive hotels with tourist buffets.